That’s Incredible!

In the early 1980s, there was a TV show that aired on ABC. It was an ancestor of sorts (along with “Real People”) of today’s reality TV shows.

I mention this show because of the word “incredible”. It’s a word that is overused and, I think, somewhat misused. In its truest form, it should really mean “not credible.”

There’s a growing list of things on all of the soaps that I’m finding “incredible”. I know that it’s a soap, and in order to make stories work, we have to suspend disbelief, or the characters have to be a bit dense from time to time.

But for THESE examples…..well, either the story has been repeated SO often, or the character has remained so static, that I just CANNOT believe it when the narrative tries to tell me otherwise.

Among the “incredible” stories:

I can’t ever, EVER buy anyone saying, at face value, that James Stenbeck, Stefano DiMera, or Victor Newman have died. Or for that matter, Taylor Hayes on B&B. Not even if their funerals were held in the town square. Not EVEN if other characters were shown poking their cold dead bodies with sticks.

I can’t believe any romantic pairing that ever happens on B&B. There’s a bell that rings that is inaudible to humans – only dogs and the characters on B&B hear it, and when they do, they randomly change partners to whoever is closest in proximity. Neighbor, family member….who cares?

I can’t believe that any sane woman with even a modicum of self-esteem would get involved with Adam Chandler, Alan Spaulding, Todd Manning, Sonny Corinthos or Jason Morgan.

I can’t buy much of what Erica Kane does anymore. I loved the first Erica cycle (in the 1970s), and the second (in the 1980s). And it was somewhat entertaining even on the THIRD go-round of Erica facing her myriad issues in the 1990s. But to have Erica still acting as flim-flam and vixenish as daughter Kendall is, indeed, NOT credible.

I’m having a hard time buying any of the stories on Guiding Light right now. It’s like reading a book. Just when I get to the last three chapters, they’re torn out of my hands (when the actors are fired) and I’m handed another book with characters I know little to nothing about.

I love Stephanie Forrester, but if she said the sky was blue, I’d still go outside to look and make sure.

I can’t believe that ANY person who is competent and has even a drop of sense would live in Port Charles, let alone start a family or a business there. In any real city, this much gunfire would have the city and the region mobilized to get rid of crime. I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating: In Port Charles, a day filled with gunfire is called a “weekday”.

I can’t believe that Victoria Lord hasn’t hired an on-site pyschotherapist to live with the family 24/7. Between her past and Jessica’s recent past, the fact that Tess has gone unnoticed is unfathomable.

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3 thoughts on “That’s Incredible!

  1. What a great idea for a column. You’ve got some great choices there.

    I especially agree about the romantic pairings on B&B. It’s just a game of musical chairs with various premutations of Brooke-Ridge coupling. But I must say that Katherine Kelly Lang and Ronn Moss are able to pull it off somewhat believably.

    A few that I’ll add:

    I’m almost to the point of not being able to buy anymore Carly-Jack break-up-to-make-ups on ATWT. Maura West and Michael Park pull it off very well, but my believability is almost stretched to the breaking point.

    I can’t believe that either Jabot or Newman would ever hire Brad Carlton back. He plays musical chairs between those two companies almost as much as Ridge and Brook do in the romance department.

    I can’t believe that constant change of ownership of Spaulding Enterprises and Lewis Oil/Construction (or whatever its called these days). It feels like a ping pong game and I need a scorecard to keep up with who owns them this week.

    I don’t buy it when any rich character suddenly go bankrupt. We know they’re going to get thier money back. How many times have Adam Chandeller and Palmer Courtlandt gone kaput just to come back? And others who’ve lost all their money just to come back include: Dorian Lord, Jasper Jax, Edward Quartermaine, Alan Spaulding. Yawn.

    I can’t believe it when Nazis show up. Didn’t believe it in the 1980s when Lars Bogard on AMC was revealed to be a Nazi of some type or another. And definitely didn’t buy one word of it in 2005 when Brad Carlton and his never before mentioned mother were hiding from Nazis.

    James, I agree with you on Jack/Carly and I’m thinking Josh/Reva and Holden/Lily belong there too.

    And I can’t believe I forgot about Spaulding Enterprises – thanks for mentioning that. First of all, nobody knows what Spaulding does. Secondly, EVERYONE IN TOWN has been in charge. The entire Spaulding family has, at one point or another. Harley. Dinah. Vanessa. Heck, I expect the board to vote in Daisy as CEO any day now. It’s just SILLY. And nobody cares anymore.

    I used to think it would be great for Spaulding to take a big hit to its profits, be forced to downsize and become Spaulding Pharmaceuticals. Then you’d have that company vs Cedars, and some interesting push/pull for the doctors. But hey, I also thought Josh as a minister was a good idea, so what do I know?

  2. I always wished they did something more with the Nazi ties storyline from seven years ago. If I was writing it, I would have James find out during a report for school, and just be horrified.

    I would’ve also brought in a possible relative of Drew Jacobs (she was Jewish, right) as a Survivor and then she could’ve talked about trying to find the light in the darkness. Oops! Then it would’ve been too close to what GL was back in the day! Sorry!

  3. Drew grew up in a Jewish family, but she was an adopted child. It didn’t seem like Selena was Jewish, but in all the ways that mattered Drew was Jewish. The story with the Spauldings having Nazi ties was automatic fast forward to me as I found it that offensive especially as part of a silly time travel plot.

    Over the years, they have mentioned some of the different businesses that Spaulding was involved with, but unfortunately I can’t remember the two or three outside of Pharmaceuticals. Otherwise, they used to own part of WSPR (there is a long story how it went from being part owned by the Spauldings to Roger getting it and Holly/Ross getting the rest, but I don’t want to bore.) I recall them owning parts of the newspaper too.

    A lot of incredible stories make me feel incredulous.

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